


Strange New World

by Merrinpippy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Voldemort, M/M, Secret Relationship, everything's better with friends y'all, questioning Harry, we love healthy supportive relationships be they platonic or romantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:48:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24914881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merrinpippy/pseuds/Merrinpippy
Summary: Harry's struggling with his identity and keeping his questioning a secret from his friends. He goes to Voldemort for advice.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Voldemort
Comments: 8
Kudos: 120





	Strange New World

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Belladonna_Riddle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Belladonna_Riddle/gifts).



“I never thought I’d say this...” Voldemort began, eyes narrowed into slits, “But you need to calm down. You are going to be suspected.” 

Harry barely refrained from kicking something, as he usually did when he was angry with the Dursleys or himself. Voldemort was fond of the upholstery in these chambers, though, so he stopped himself. 

“It’s… it’s hard,” he bit out. He rubbed his eyes. “It’s fine anyway. I’m suspected of something every school year, and by the end of every year everyone’s forgotten. People are used to me being curious about the wrong things.” 

“But not about this thing.” 

Voldemort indicated for him to sit across from — them? Harry frowned. He’d just come out of a strange confrontation with Madam Pince about the library books on gender and sexuality that had left him flustered and self-righteous. He’d been so worked up he’d forgotten to ask. 

“What are your pronouns today?” 

“She/her will be fine, thank you Harry.” Voldemort inclined her head as he sat across from her. It was difficult for Harry sometimes to set aside his preconceived notions of gender and think of Voldemort as a woman, or even a man sometimes, as inhuman as she often was. But he was working on it. On unlearning the misogyny the Dursleys had fed him with, and on figuring out his own identity. 

Harry sighed. 

“You understand, now, why I have so little tolerance for the Wizarding World at large.” 

“I just didn’t think it would be a big deal. When I got the letter to Hogwarts it all just felt so freeing, you know?”

Voldemort’s smile was wistful. “Yes, I remember my own experience being rather similar. I’ve always said you and I are very alike.” 

“Didn’t believe you at first.” 

Voldemort’s smile widened. “And then you did.” 

Harry bit his lip. “I told Luna.” 

Voldemort’s eyes flashed, and her smile disappeared. She leaned forward, her presence nearly suffocating. “What happened?” 

“She shrugged,” Harry replied. “And then she gave me a flower, and we continued what we were doing.” 

Voldemort relaxed then. “That could have been very dangerous,” she admonished. 

“You don’t know Luna.” 

“But I know the penchant of teenagers for eavesdropping, and the ease with which one can do so with magic,” Voldemort countered. “Now, I know you rarely favour subtlety — ”

“If that’s a thinly veiled insult — ”

“There was nothing veiled about it,” Voldemort deadpanned. “You are bold and brash and courageous, but you do not think before you act, and you do not plan for consequences. This makes you fast acting in a crisis, but leaves you open and unguarded with alarming frequency.” 

Harry looked away, knowing it to be true. He was a Gryffindor through and through.

“I do not say this to strike you down,” Voldemort said softly. “I say this in the hope that you learn from my own mistakes. I too thought I would be welcomed for who I was, finally amongst my own people. But first, my blood status made me an outcast, and later… had I not taken care of the Warren girl after she discovered me in the girl’s bathroom, I would have been ruined before I even began.” 

Harry felt intensely grateful, suddenly, that he and Ron were always accompanied by Hermione on their trips to Myrtle’s bathroom. As far as he knew, Myrtle had never suspected Harry questioning gender and the like. 

Voldemort continued, “Even as it was, Dumbledore scrutinised me far more than should have been necessary. He had met me in the orphanage and invited me to Hogwarts personally, and I suppose, did not want another scandal like his brother’s to mar his image.” 

Harry swallowed. “Look, I’m… I’m sorry, okay, I just want to  _ know _ _ — _ _ ”  _

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Voldemort cut in smoothly, tapping her nails on her wand. “I just worry that you will undergo the same fate as my own. As I grew more confident in myself and my powers, there were those who did not like that  _ I  _ of all people was better than they. I split myself apart to keep myself safe from them, and it still wasn’t enough.” 

“There’s also the fact that you’re an evil dictator,” Harry said. 

Voldemort made a dismissive noise. “That’s besides the point,” she chided. 

“Have you considered that maybe attitudes will be better now, stuffy librarians excepted?” 

Voldemort gave him a  _ look.  _

“Not  _ that  _ much better!” Harry defended himself. “Just… a little better. My friends would understand, I know they would. I just…” he sagged. “I can’t do this by myself. I want to be  _ me.  _ And that means figuring who  _ me  _ really is.” 

“‘Who I really am’,” Voldemort corrected absently. 

Harry glared. “I was making a point.” 

“Feel free to do so with correct grammar,” she said, smile creeping back on her face. 

Harry rolled his eyes. “Voldemort. I appreciate your help, and your guidance. And I agree that having the whole Wizarding World find out that I’m not super convinced I’m male — at least all the time — is a really bad idea.” 

“For once, Rita Skeeter would be on your side,” Voldemort joked, but Harry knew intimately what Voldemort thought of him revealing himself. It had led, recently, to several arguments between them. Harry hated arguing with her more than anything. 

“Hilarious,” Harry lied. “But I think I need more than the person I’m secretly dating to help me figure this out. I just need people in my corner. You had the, whatever you called them — ”

“Knights of Walpurgis.” 

Harry scrunched his face up. “See, this is an example of you not always being right about things.” 

“I changed their names!” Voldemort protested. 

Harry raised his eyebrows. “To ‘Death Eaters’?” 

Voldemort leaned back in her seat. She made it look like she was sitting on a throne, no matter wherever she was, and her robes fanned out regally about her. “Keep talking this way if you ever want to bear the Dark Mark and see what happens.” 

Harry snorted. “You  _ mark  _ me quite often, if you remember.” 

“And I assume you want me to continue to do so,” Voldemort smirked. 

Harry flushed, and Voldemort laughed that high laugh of hers that Harry had grown, over the last few months, oh so fond of. But the silence that followed was loaded with things unsaid. 

“I need my friends,” Harry impressed quietly. 

Voldemort was never prone to compassion, but she seemed to see something of herself in Harry, which made her a surprisingly gentle guide, in regards to identity. Not in their magic lessons — though Harry had to admit he was getting better with every visit. 

But Voldemort’s compassion for him — or perhaps it was simply self-obsession — softened her expression towards him, and Harry knew he had won this round. 

_ “Be careful  _ with who you tell,” Voldemort warned. 

It felt like a weight lifting from Harry’s chest. Hermione and Ron had always been his closest confidantes. Voldemort had been right to instill Harry with the sort of paranoia that would keep him safe while he explored his identity, but he missed being able to tell his two best friends everything. 

Of course, he  _ could  _ have told them without Voldemort’s permission, but somehow over the past few months the two had developed a bond. A strong bond. And Harry was reluctant to do anything Voldemort didn’t approve of, these days, especially after Voldemort had ceased her own attacks. 

They were on their way to a better future, Harry thought. And he would not be alone. He would make it his mission to not only discover himself, but to create a world where he and Voldemort and anyone could be whoever they were, just themselves, and simply be free. Even if he had to do it by converting one person at a time, starting with Ron and Hermione. 

Voldemort kissed his hand, and then his cheek, and then his lips, before he returned to the fireplace and grabbed a handful of floo powder. For the first time in a while, he felt optimistic about what was to come. And as he spoke the words to send him back to Hogsmeade, he looked forward to returning to a Hogwarts that would truly accept him, no matter who or what he turned out to be. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, feel free to leave a comment if you like! Much love & have a nice day!


End file.
